When You're Gone

 I don’t want to say good bye ever again.

To turn a corner and not be able to see you

To reach you

In case the unthinkable happens

In case this world tries to hurt you, to take you…

I don’t want to not be there

To throw myself in front of that harm

To use my flesh and bones to shield you from the dangers of this world

That every day seems to grow more dangerous

More frightening

More uncertain…

I can’t imagine why anyone would ever want to hurt you little one

Yet it happens far too often

To ignore

To hope

To believe it couldn’t happen to you

I would scorch the flesh from my bones before I let you come to harm

And that is why I never want to walk away

That my heart clinches every time a door closes

And you are on the other side

For then I open the door to your room

And imagine knowing you’re never coming back to it

And the fracturing, burning, unfathomable emptiness opens up inside me

I fall to my knees, cradling your stuffed bear

And imagine that terror and pain

And the guilt that I wasn’t there…

Never Got to Say Good Bye

 I never got to see you
Once more before you left forever
One thing that I’ve learned is true
Is life is as uncertain as the weather

They say that death is not the end
And each end brings us to something new
But I wanted to talk with you again
And now that’s something that I’ll never do

I don’t know why you were away so long
Or what you even did while you were there
And I’ll never know now that you’re gone
I won’t waste my breath to say this ain’t fair

I’m sad for all the time we lost
Chapters in each other’s lives we never read
Despite wishes, summer always turns to frost
And I’ll never get more gold from this lead

For I never got to see you
Once more before you left forever
And one thing that I’ve learned is true
Is life is as uncertain as the weather