Deviated

Oxygen measured in the moments

Stolen

By distraction, contraction

Within face and chest

and all the rest

Blurs, receding in a distant vacuum

Another, one more gloom

Day, as my nose and mouth heave
That today I just can't breathe

Drugs and nose guards and stimulants

Just don't increase the performance

Of what I was born with

But can no longer enjoy

Gulps of breath stolen

Glands swollen

And I awake gasping

Throat rasping

Teeth and gums dry

And I cannot deny

That I would try

Anything, to return my respiratory functions

To employ

My eyes and dark circles

Hand fulls of red pills

To make one more night bearable

But I feel like I'm failing

As nothing's prevailing

To help drag me through one more day

Stimulants clustered

So that I can muster

Enough strength

To face another day

I greet each day ragged

From my breathing so jagged

That it alarms my lovers

Fills them with dismay

Hours of sleep threaded together

By drugs and drinks

And whatever

I can find

to get me through

One more night

Each night a patchwork

Of panicked wakings

My body shaking

My chest heaving

Because I just stop breathing

And I'm fighting to drag

Each drought of oxygen

Into starving lungs

That yank the air

From an ever tightening sieve

Clawing for breath

From deep in my chest

I'm not greedy

But I just want to live

And I drag myself from bed

My face aching

My will breaking

Not knowing how much

More I have to give